February: Bird

I met Bird in 2009 just after my freshman year of college and her lessons have stuck with me since. When I first came up with the idea for this blog she was one of the first people to pop into my head. When you read her story below, I’m sure it will become clear why. So many people can attest to how Bird has changed their world and I am so happy to know that she stays true to what she tells others and continues to change the lives of those around her every day.

She is 48 years young, married and has four awesome kids. Her oldest is a sophomore in college currently studying engineering “He is amazing, smart but also responsible and caring.  When he left his freshman year, I cried almost the entire 8 hour drive back to New Mexico.” Her second son is a freshman in high school.  “He is the child most like his mother, which is not always a good thing.  He has a great sense of humor, an artist, drummer and bright kid.” Her third is in the 7th grade.  “He is a 40 year-old trapped in a 12 year old body.  His insight and off-beat sense of humor put a smile on our faces every day.  If he isn’t a priest he will live in a house with his family and 30 cats.” Last but not least is her one and only girl.  “She rules the roost because we all fear her.  She is fiercely independent and like her eldest brother strives to be a valedictorian, I imagine she will talk about that when she is President of the United States.”

Bird is a licensed mental health counselor currently working at East Mountain High School as a Student Advisor but she has been working with students since she was one herself. “I recognize that the struggles people have don’t get solved overnight.  It may take a lot of time, energy and support from people around them.  I decided that I would try to help people who were in ‘my corner of the world’, in other words, people who I had the ability to help.”

Bird’s focus on helping youngsters is not coincidence. She says she chooses to work with students because she wants to help those who are struggling. “I want them to know that there is help, support, answers and hope. I spend a lot of my day as the recipient of eye rolls and negotiations, but I know that the students know I care. I have started joking that it took me 30 years (#classof84rules) to be ‘cool’ in high school.  I was so awkward in high school, I was not popular, I struggled with self-esteem, I was not a great student.  My mother passed away when I was 15, it was really hard.  My dad was our rock, but high school was difficult.”

Working toward change can sometimes feel like an uphill battle. Bird says the hardest part of what she dedicates her life to is “working with a student who is making a series of bad choices and not being able to help them see that there are better options.” Because there can be so many challenges it's important to celebrate the little wins. When Bird was 25 years old, she started presenting at a University orientation program. She would speak with the students about stereotypes and differences and emphasize that words mean things. “At every session I would say that if I was able to get one person, ONE person to change their corner of the world positively that I would have made a difference.  For 22 years I talked to 300 college freshman every summer for 16 weeks.  If someone did something positive for someone just once, every week for the past 22 years?  Game changer.”

I’ll end with a particularly touching story that one of her former students shared.

“On the last day of our senior year you sat [us] down to pretty much say goodbye. In each of our goodbyes you told each of us something personal to us, that we needed to hear but probably didn't know that we needed to hear. When you got to me you told me that I needed to stop hating myself and that I needed to give myself a break and be easier on me. You said that I needed to look around and see that there were people all around me that love and care about me and that I needed to love myself too. Which then inspired me to get the tattoo Don't Forget to love yourself."

Bird creates a phenomenal ripple effect of positive change everywhere she goes. The people she interacts with take notice and start to spread that love as well. She is an amazing example of being the change she wishes to see in the world and slowly, but surely, the world around her is changing.